A Bit More Timely Report...May 2012

[sistereurope]

Dear OP friends,
I've been suffering from a particularly severe bout of PPD ever since returning from my girls trip, May 14-21. It's bad...I can't concentrate, daydream of living in Paris all day long...feel immense jealousy/anger when I read about people who are in Paris now..sigh! So I thought I'd do one of my impressionist trip reports in the hopes of alleviating some of this bad PPD...

So, here goes, in my no particular order or importance reflections:

We stayed in the 11th and I loved the location of the apartment. I also loved the apartment, although it was a little weird for the 3 of us in that the shower room (separate toilet) doesn't have walls separating the shower room from the bedroom (there are blinds for privacy though). Aside from that, it was a great value: 700 euros total, 92 sq meters with an elevator, 2 blocks from the Voltaire metro. www.homelidays.co.uk/paris-11/apartment-flat-161777en1.htm I'd stay there again.

I was with 2 of my best friends, one who travels a lot and another who had never been out of the US. Note: be very careful when traveling with 2 friends. It turned out that the novice traveler was a joy to be with...she was so easygoing and happy to be in Paris...we had similar habits in every way and got along great. The other friend (thankfully we're still friends!) was on a different schedule and there was a bit of friction for me, the trip organizer. We eventually worked everything out but there was some tension and unfortunately my one friend missed out on some of my best memories, which include:

-sitting on the terrace at my most favorite bar, Lou Pascalou, in the 20th. It sits in the corner, iconic yellow Paris light shining on the cobblestones....scooters driving by...a really friendly mellow crowd talking, smoking (not me, but we were outside so it was ok!) and drinking wine...my agreeable friend and I spent a nice weekday evening there, talking into the night. And we returned on our next to last evening to meet my friend' Loic's friend A, who, when we arrived, informed us (in her charming French accent) that we were going to be enlisted to "kill a man". ;D Whew!! It was a fabulous evening and even though we didn't kill a man, I did meet some really great people (friends of my dear Loic's gf) and it was one of those nights when you are aware of just BEING in Paris, and living life to the fullest. We dined on the largest cheese and charcuterie board I've ever seen, talked and talked and stayed out til 3!!...it was just magical...

As was our 3 hour lunch at Chez L'Ami Jean, when I not only got to sit under the kitchen with a bunch of my Chowhound idols, I got to FINALLY meet Jo!! Who so kindly invited me and my friends to said lunch, so I will remain forever in her debt. She is awesome and beautiful and I love her...I hope that this will be the first of many visits to Paris together. Here's a link to my Chowhound thoughts:
chowhound.chow.com/topics/832022

Thanks to Jo, I met the most fabulous N, a Paris Chowhound regular who lives the most wonderful life in Paris with her equally fabulous husband D. They so kindly took me and my friends on a tour of the covered passages (in the 9th) the evening before our lunch...they were so kind to share their knowledge and experiences with us. I had never seen the passages and I was blown away, both by the passages and by the wonderful N and D, who invited us to their apartment on Sunday for an indescribable seafood feast. Great food, wine and conversation ensued...my newbie friend said that she felt like she got both the touristy highlights and the "real" Paris, all in one trip...yay!

So yes, we also hit the tourist trail! Montmarte the first night, and what a beautiful night it was...a perfect pink sky. We walked through the Marais to Notre Dame (my fave tourist spot), we walked the Promemade Plantee and shopped the rue Monge to procure picnic supplies for a feast in the BEAUTIFUL Jardin des Plantes. We walked through Pere Lachaise to Belleville, where we had a nice lunch overlooking the city before walking through the graffiti...we went to the Louvre and saw the ML and sat in the Jardin des Tuilleries...we took the Vendettes de Pont Neuf and had a cone at Berthillion whiile watching the accordian players. And we spent a great Sat at a brocante in Oberkampf where I bought a 70's tunic and a ring for my daughter...

My newbie friend had one request...to see the ET sparkle at night. So, on our last evening, we went to a steak frites place in the 8th, and then we TRIED to go to the Trocadero, me telling her that it was the very best place to see the ET (it was raining on and off and such a great night....at one point, we stopped by the Georges V to check out les toilettes. The best free toilettes EVER! Merci to Gitte for taking me there first ;D!!) Of course, as usual, I got us so lost...we saw the sparkle at 11, but we weren't at the Trocedero! So we soldiered on, walking walking walking, and finally, we found it, and it was near midnight! So my friend got to see the ET sparkle at midnight...on her last night in Paris...and we danced on the plaza...tears flowed. It was so great...

I have a million more memories, but these are really the highlights. Paris has worked her way even more into my soul...as I wrote to Jo, I always think that the next trip will "scratch my itch", and that I'll be ok to travel other places for a while...when no, in reality, Paris digs even deeper and I know that I will be back...I HAVE to go back, and if I am lucky enough to do so soon I will consider myself even more blessed...

Bon soir mes amis!!

[nutsabouttravel]

SisterEurope, I'm sorry you're experiencing such a bad case of PPD. I think we all know how that feels. No matter how many times I compare my lucky life to others and the fact that I am going to be on my 22nd trip to Paris this year, I sometimes dwell on the longing for Paris (or fill in the blank) rather than the gratitude. Of course, this is a comment about me, but maybe others have similar thoughts at times.

Anyway, I am intrigued by your experiences with your friends. I, too, have learned (perhaps the hard way) that traveling with some of my best friends has not always been as good as traveling with someone having the following characteristics: cheerfulness, flexibility and the willingness to change plans in an instant, not being a super picky eater, similar rhythm and pace, sense of adventure, comfort in experiencing a different way of life, similar ideas on what to spend money on. These are the criteria that are important to me. I'm curious about others and what they look for in a traveling companion...

[Shoesy]

What an awesone experience you had, Sis ! Cherish those memories. I hope your PPD becomes less painful because your case seems really bad.
It's understandable that best friends don't necessarily make the best traveling companions. I'm glad that your frictions didn't ruin your friendship.
How nice that you got to meet Jo and the others that you mentioned! I've found that socializing makes a Paris trip even more special.

[mez]

Sis,

Your report has come just at the right time. I don't have a lot of time in Paris this time around - only 3 days really - but reading your report made me realise it's ok. Being there is enough.

I am glad your previous non-traveller friend enjoyed herself. Who knows? She may have been bitten by the travel bug.

[jo]

Hey Sis,

What a great report and how awesome it was to finally meet you! Our lunch just flew by (amazing how 2.5 hours flies by when you are having the time of your life) and I really wish we had had more time to talk and get to know each other. Next time, because there will be a next time.. ;D

I'm so happy you finally got to meet N & D ~ I just knew you guys would hit it off. Also really jealous of your seafood feast, but in a nice way

Your apartment looks great and very reasonable. Den and I really enjoyed this area too (Dawn and I were about 2 blocks from each other, believe it or not!) and I would stay there again.

I know what you mean about going with friends ~ we shared an apartment in Paris with our very good friends in the fall of 2010. Although we had a great trip, it did get tiring to have to share decisions about everything we were going to do, see and eat every day. We travel well with these friends, but we came to the conclusion that trips that don't involve all these daily decisions work best for us (like all inclusive trips to the Caribbean). Since my decision to go to Paris in January by myself, I've actually (nicely) told the female half of this couple that I wanted to enjoy my week solo. She wanted to come along when she heard about it, but I am so looking forward to being in Paris by myself (but having as many GTGs as I can. Since these are not Den's thing, I figure I will fit in as many as possible.)

Sitting at a great cafe with friends and whiling away the evening with wine, charcuterie, cheese and talk sounds like just about the perfect way to spend time in Paris ~ hopefully we can do just that in January!

I can just see the 2 of you on that last night, enjoying Eiffel's sparkle and just marvelling at the joy of being in Paris. I also can't seem to get enough of Paris and although I know we will enjoy Greece again in the fall, I kind of wish we were just going back to Paris. Hence the week in January, when most Canadians are looking to escape to somewhere warm. My soul craves Paris, just like yours does, Sis. We may be kindred spirits, lol

Thanks so much for sharing this trip with us. I'm bookmarking your apartment and really hoping we can meet up in January.

Happy weekend!

Jo

[mossie]

There is only one salve for PPD, get the next trip organised and immerse yourself in life and work, until the moment comes.

So pleased you thoroughly enjoyed yourself. One has to be selfish on these trips, be totally self indulgent and do your own thing. Note to Jo and others. That is why I find solo trips are the only way to go.

After seven weeks in hospital my wife is finally settled in a nursing home where I feel happy that there are kind and considerate staff to look after her.

So now I am starting to relax and plan my next trip ;D ;D ;D

[geordy]

Good advice Mossie! And all best wishes for the missus.

Sis, I , like many others here, understand completely..all of it!

My first ever trip to Paris was with a sister and my best friend at the time. A disaster, including my spraining my ankle the first nite there!
I don't think 3 is a good number for travel!

Didn't think I liked Paris much after that...but luckily gave it another try..due to an invite from Mumm's to come pick up a free bottle! and the rest is history!

Back when I was first going and with some frequency..I did explore possibly living there...researching US companies with offices in France and such..but after being there on 9/11 I realized I could not be happy not being in NYC....but I'd still go for a half and half deal!

But I see hope for you.....if it is truly what you want..work towards it..as you are with learning the language, making more contacts there..and working on Mr Sister! And , of course, getting there as much as possible!

PS think I got most of the kkkkk's!

And watching the French Open women's final and looking at Paris!

[sistereurope]

Mossie, best wishes to your wife. I hope that you get to go to Paris soon...many positive travel vibes your way...

Thank god for the forum as reflecting and writing trip reports are good medicine for PPD...not a cure, but it helps. Thinking back on our trip I am happy that there were so many positive, wonderful memories. An overwhelming majority actually.

I have traveled enough to know to discuss travel habits beforehand. It's really ironic because the one friend who proved to be difficult stated over and over again before the trip that she knew that we'd probably sleep in later and stay up later...that she was more of an introvert who is used to traveling alone and so we shouldn't get mad if she went off on her own...etc. But when we got there it seemed that what she really wanted was for us to be on her schedule - all that traveling alone meant that she was used to doing what she wants. She'd pop up at 6-7 am, take a shower and tap her foot waiting for us to get going and didn't seem to want to go off alone as she had warned us that she'd do! And she rushed from one thing to the other, always wanting to make a plan...leaving my friend who had never been out of the states little time to process anything. I guess that the uptight one finally got fed up with me and my more mellow friend's habits as she finally started to go off on her own and we were able to relax and do what we wanted, and she left one day early (and in retrospect that was our best day). It's sad because I really like them both here, I just won't ever travel with the uptight one ever again. There were some happy times that the 3 of us spent together, but also some not so happy ones, which is not what you ever want in Paris!!! It's funny too because the uptight one had no idea that she had caused us stress until we talked after...thankfully we worked it out and we're all still friends. I will never travel with her again though...

Oh, and I completely forgot another highlight...we were walking down the Rue du Rivoli and we came upon all of these people as we got closer to the Hotel de Ville, and there were police and the roads were blocked off...and I realized that Hollande was there, giving a speech! My friends laughed because I was so happy...I made them listen to the speech and waved at his motorcade after it was over. I am such a political geek. My other proud moment was having a political discussion, mainly in French, with a woman at my favorite olive oil shop in the Marche d'Aligre. It was a great moment, and I'm happy too that I can say that I have a favorite olive oil store, how cool is that?!... ;D

So I'll get to go back for a few days in Oct with Mr Sister - we're going to Burgundy with a stop in Paris. And, I really am thinking of joining the solo OPers in Jan for a solo trip of my own...stay tuned!!

PS Here's another highlight...dinner at Vivant in the 10th, a fabulous restaurant owned by the hunky Pierre Jancou...mmmm
www.wineterroirs.com/2011/04/vivant_pierre_jancou_paris.html

[janetnj]

Sis - what an evocative report. Your words capture what I think so many of us feel. An exalt to you!

Ah - traveling with friends. I take comfort hearing so many others have had similar experiences to me. I've just booked a Baltics cruise with a friend in 2013 to celebrate a birthday ending in 0. We've already talked about giving each other the space to do our own thing.

Thanks for taking the time to post I think it helps all of us with PPD.

[denise]

:'(Oh Sis, I feel your pain!

There was a time when the PPD was SO bad that I thought "I can't stand this everytime I return from Paris I will go cold turkey and stop going".

There was also a time, after I spent a month in Paris and was glad to come home, that I thought I was "over" it because the joy of being back overcame the PPD. but I was wrong. Eventually the old yearning came back and I had to go again.
.
I do make my self go to other places, to broaden my mind and for Michael, I have wonderful times,....but it is not Paris.

I also know what you mean about the friend you travelled with. My relationship with the friend who "did not want to move out of the street," has never been the same since sadly. and I agree with Mossie. Solo travel IS the best way.

It would be great if you could come in January. When there are other OPFers around you get the best of both worlds. Nobody expects you to follow their schedule and you can join in or go off on your own if you want. I am am not actually alone. Lizzie will be with me, but I am trying to persuade her to go off on her own.

I certainly need space as well.

Mossie.So glad to hear your wife is now being cared for and you have some freedom

Denise
love from England

[Shoesy]

Sis - Your experience with your well-traveled friend can be a lesson to many of us. It's amazing to think that she wasn't even aware of the stress until you discussed it with her. Gotta keep the lines of communication open at all times.

Mossie - Glad to hear that your mind has been set at ease knowing that your wife has been placed in a home that will provide good care.
I am certain that frequent trips to Paris will be on your agenda.

[mez]

I have been travelling by myself for so long because none of my friends are really interested in travel - and they most definitely do not understand why I choose to visit the same places multiple times.

I am currently planning a trip to NYC with a friend, who will be visiting for the city for the first time. The planning to date has been interesting.


Mossie, glad to hear your wife is settled.

[Sandy M]

Great report Sis - sounds like you had a fab time apart from the issue with one of your traveling friends. Happy to know it turned out okay and you are all still friends.

I have also had a bad experience traveling with a friend - thought I knew her but I was sadly mistaken - she didn't like anything about Paris and grumbled and complained the whole time - plus, she didn't tell me that she wasn't that mobile which made getting around very difficult. I learned a good lesson! Since then, I have had a couple of friends who hint that they would like to go to Paris with me and I have just told them what the ground rules are about time alone, etc., etc. and then they change their mind about going which is fine with me. I do thoroughly enjoy our GTG times but I also treasure my time alone!

Mossie - so sorry to hear about your wife, however it is probably best for all concerned - it must have been very difficult for you to care for her at home. I hope she gets along well and that you enjoy your trips to Paris!

As for the PPD, we all suffer from that - seems like I never get over it and the only cure is another trip to Paris

[travelluver]

Mossie, Glad to hear your wife is in a good facility and being well cared for. My best to you both -

Sis, I know we shared some stories about traveling with others. I've had a couple of trips where tensions arose with my most recent being when friends wanted to travel through the French countryside with my husband acting as chauffeur, then proceeded to fall asleep during the entire car ride! After that, I said no way am I entertaining friends back to back for two weeks at a time during our travels. At least you had a great time with one of your friends. It is funny, I find some people so thankful for the opportunity to be in Paris, that you can plop them down anywhere and they would still have the biggest grin on their face! My sister and mom are coming with me in a few weeks, we'll be celebrating mom's 80th b'day. It will be her fourth visit, but like your friend, the first for my sister, and her first time over to Europe. I really want it to be the best for them both. My sister keeps saying she doesn't care what she does. She is leaving 4 kids behind and says she just wants to sit in cafes, sip wine, and watch Paris unfold before her. PS A share in our apt just went up for sale - I see you there!!

[sistereurope]

Wouldn't I love to have a share in your building?! Gotta convince the mister!!!

;D

[sistereurope]

Also, I forgot this funny story:
The rudest person I've ever encountered in Paris
We were in a shop in the Marais, and after saying Bonjour to the shop clerk, I said: Excusez-moi, s'il vous plait, la robe, la-bas, c'est combien?, pointing to a dress on the wall.
And she looked at me with this really haughty look and said: "I'm going to speak to you in English because I can not understand your French." In the most snotty way ever...
Now, I know that my accent isn't great, but wow! That was really uncalled for!! I was rendered speechless (which if you know me is a hard thing to do), and we left.
I felt better after, when I was recalling the incident to Loic's girlfriend, in French btw, she said "you should have said to her, in French:
"and I'm going to speak to you in French because I can not understand your English"
;D

[jo]

I think the best part of our trip to Paris last month was how much Seb "got" Paris. He was such a joy to be with each and every day and he was happy to see new things, try new foods, hang out in the parks, take the metros and buses, walk hours a day and be with his old grandma and poppa for 12 days. He made the trip such a success and could probably show a few adults what Paris is really all about.

Jo (yeah, I just love that child a little tiny bit, lol)